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Wisdom Vine

Helping Your Child Deal with Pressure

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

Albert Einstein

In the present age, where competition has spread its tentacles in every walk of life, it is crucial to teach our kids to be grounded. And comparing them at each step will just not help, rather it will make them very confused and inferior, they will get irritable which will be very hindering their further development. They should be taught to better themselves with each day, not to be better than their counterparts. Sometimes when we are disappointed with our child’s results, we use such sentences like “Look at him/her, he/she is so much better than you” or “Why can’t you be more like him/her?”  As much as we want to refrain from it, we end up doing it. Well, “comparison” is counter-productive for anyone. But it is all the more debasing for children.

We should also consider its side effects. We should understand that every child is different, the way of thinking and working is different/unique for every individual. It is natural to want to know where our children stand amidst others, in this world of ranks and percentages and where everyone is bidding for that coveted seat in a top school or university. But to constantly harangue them about how much better others are will do nothing but lay the foundation for an inferiority complex, which leads to:-

  • Self-doubt
  • Jealousy will take root
  • It will damage the parent-child relationship
  • It will breed negativity
  • They will grow into jittery and nervous adults

Before we see the way to avoid this, we should understand a word, which is actually a phase of the life of any child and that is Adolescence.

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15-year-old Vaibhav was coming home late from school almost every day. He also seemed moody and distracted at home. He grew his hair long, was doing poorly at school, and ate little. His mother found a cigarette in his jacket; she knew there was a problem. ‘Does this seem to be natural behavior of the child, don’t you find anything wrong with Vaibhav’. Definitely, there’s something different. now, what’s that? 

This is characteristic of adolescent age. And what it means is described in the next Para:-   

Adolescence is the age of change. It is a vulnerable time when kids can develop unhealthy habits that grow into problems in their adult life. Behavior issues of adolescence, which are quite common, also crop up during this time, making it impossible for parents to reach out to their teenagers. It also brings with it a lot of problems that parents should understand and solve like:-

  • Physical changes
  • Emotional changes
  • Behavioral changes
  • Substance Use and Abuse
  • Health problems
  • Psychological problems
  • Educational challenges
  • Addiction to cyberspace
  • Aggression and violence

You may have been a teenager yourself. Think about it – your adolescent is at an age that you have already been through. Be empathetic and try to understand what your child is going through. That makes dealing with their problems easier.

How to deal with it?

  • Be there for your teen
  • Find common ground to discuss
  • Listen without judging or giving advice.
  • Expect a child’s failure/rejection.

Some other ways to handle their peer pressure and support them:-

  • Give Unconditional Love and Support
  • Give Unconditional Love and Support
  • Appreciate the Strengths
  • Help Your Child to Cope With His Weakness
  • Do not Compare, Rather Set Benchmarks
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Wisdom Vine

What is More Important Skill or Degree?

The value of something is shown by demand: 23 lakh candidates (including 2.22 lakh engineers and 255 Ph.D. holders) applied for the 368 vacant peon posts in Uttar Pradesh recently. : — an article from Times of India.

We collect our degrees after years of school and college education but panic strikes when we find ourselves jobless! Why are so many of India’s youth population unemployed? We are facing a serious skill development crunch in the entire education process as the Indian system focuses on an instructor-based approach and rote learning.  

Our country is moving in the direction of development, and its speed can only be achieved through the combination of skills and knowledge. Every year millions of children graduate in different courses in India, but the majority of them remain unemployed. There was a report of aspiring minds According to which, 1.5 lakh engineering students passed from 650 colleges in 2015, but 80% remains unemployed. Despite some initiatives taken by the government towards enhancing skill development, there still exists a large gap between supply and demand, with students expressing their frustration by way of limited job opportunities and corporate looking for quality talent.

There are many points that should be taken care of and worked on:-

  1. The curriculum we are taught is quite old, it has nothing to do with real time scenario now which needs to be updated.
  2. In today’s time, everyone is following marks because the cutoff percentage of every exam is on that basis In order to get more marks; everyone is using shortcut method to achieve success without any effort.
  3. The limited use of technology in the classroom is another deterrent to developing relevant job ready skills among the students.
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Comparing skills and degree individually and discussing their importance.

Degree:-

 Firstly, I would like to say that a degree is not just about getting a job. The benefits affect all parts of life; intellectual, social, sporting, personal, artistic, ethical, and so much more. Thus experience may teach you that ‘doing it that way does not work’, but education gives you the theoretical knowledge and analytical skill to show why it does not work. Education develops your speed of learning and ability to learn at depth.

Skills:- 

Nowadays everyone seems to have a or wants to have a degree, and there is still a tendency to jump straight into starting one as soon as possible. But is it the right way to go? The top 20 percent of ITI graduates will get more salaries than the bottom 20 percent of engineers. Skilling is not the end-of-the-pipe training but something which needs to be integrated into college education. 

There is an inherent gap between the number of graduates per year and the associated employment metrics. The majority of graduates are said to be unemployable. This is primarily because even though they have a graduation degree, a number of them do not have the required skills needed in today’s ever-evolving job industry to get employed. : – according to the Ministry of Human Resources and Development

Conclusion:

Skill is always important than a degree. But if one has skill with proper qualification with good self-confidence he will definitely go to a higher position. Skill will help a person to earn.  If he has skill but without qualification, companies cannot hire him. A person may be a good mechanic but he has no engineering qualification then he cannot claim he is an engineer. With India’s large youth population – 10 lakh children will join the labour force every year – we need to act firmly, quickly, and boldly. Indian education faces the impossible trinity of cost, quality, and scale, and we need a number of independent and different solutions. A degree is a means to get a job in a company or firm but it requires skill to do the job properly.

The ideal is a good combination of both theoretical knowledge and practical understanding, and I believe this is better.

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Wisdom Vine

Ways to Help Your Child Decide their Career.

Have you ever wondered why making a decision can be so difficult for teenagers? It’s because the area of the brain responsible for decision-making may also indulge in the emotions, impulses and instinctive behavior. As a result, it can be difficult for them to plan and think about the consequences of their actions. But parents or care-takers do not take all these things seriously and take actions according to their instincts like:-

When a child does not do well in studies, then the parents would think that what he will do in life after going ahead? They do not want to understand their child very well or listen to their problems but instead force them to do the work in which they do not find any interest and without any interest, the child will not be able to give their best effort in that career, then after that, the child will be blamed for not doing any work. The biggest problem in India is that the child does not choose their own career. A child is told that it is good to choose a career according to their parents’ choice. And then later the child will not be able to do any work well and will spend his entire life thinking that he is useless. You can only be a guide to your children and not a ruler. Help them to choose their career not force them to follow your dream.

What to do if you don’t want your child to face it all?

As a parent or care-taker, talk to your child about a career that interests them. You can help them to research different careers or find out the skills and qualifications needed to do certain jobs. You can be a positive influence on your child’s choices. Your child will need to make decisions at different times. It’s important for you to ask them about careers from time to time. Get them to chat about the jobs they see other people doing. This could be someone they know or admire. It could be people they pass on the street, see on television or in magazines. You could also discuss types of jobs that might be relevant to their interests, skills, or aspirations.

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To help your child with career planning, it’s important you that:

  • listen, don’t judge them.
  • are open to ideas and encourage them to explore all their options.
  • keep in mind that your child’s choices and decisions should be based on their aspirations and abilities, not on what you think they should do.
  • remember that not everyone has a clear idea of what they want to do so your child’s career ideas may change as they get older.

Once your child has some ideas about what they would like to do, encourage them to do some research. You can help them find out what is needed to work in a certain career or how they can achieve it. As well as helping them decide on their next steps, you will also be helping them to develop the decision-making skills important in adult life. They’ll need to consider the pros and cons of various options, make a decision based on the information available – then put their plan into action. 

To help your child to think about different choices, you can encourage them to:

  • talk about their career ideas and future plans.
  • research various careers.
  • know about options available in education, employment, and training.
  • discuss ideas and options with teachers or careers advisers at school or college.
  • find out about training, college, and university entrance requirements as well as what is needed for jobs they are interested in.
  • develop their skills by taking part in clubs and activities, both within and outside of school – this will help them when they are applying for courses or jobs.
  • find out about the world of work through work experience and extra-curricular activities by talking to relatives and family friends about the kinds of work they do.
  • go to careers events their school organizes.

If your child hasn’t yet made a decision, remind them that they aren’t alone. It takes time, and with each step, they’ll be closer to knowing what they want to do.